My Facebook news feed is full of friends and acquaintances who have recently gotten married. Most are right around my age, give or take a few years. If you know me, you’ve probably heard me say I dislike wedding and love marriages. I don’t like dressing up. I don’t like dancing. I don’t like summer outdoor weddings in Texas (seriously, why?). But I LOVE marriages. I get teary-eyed and choked up just thinking about people getting married. It brings my heart joy. I love seeing the photos and hearing about those weddings (that I kind of hope I don’t have to go to), I love seeing them be so excited about the life they are starting together. I try to pray for them whenever I see a photo or something that brings their marriage to mind.
I’m also really thankful I’ve already been married for three years- that we were married young. I was 21, and hadn’t been graduated long enough to get my diploma framed (which it still isn’t, whoops. I don’t even know where it is). Wes was supposed to be graduated, but had to wait until that August after a short summer session. He was 23, almost 24. We’d been dating for about 2.5 years at that point. Engaged for 9 months.
I’ve had friends says they have no idea how we or other people we know who got married around the same age, did it. That if they got married when they were that young it probably wouldn’t have gone well. Well, you’ll never be fully ready. I think it helped we had older, wiser, couples who were honest with us. Families in our church who were willing to open their homes to us college kids so we could see what the daily ins and outs of a family working to glorify the Lord looks like. The failures and the accomplishments both.
I think it helped we had a pastor who preached the Gospel from the pulpit and how it should affect your marriage. I think it helped that our pastor, during counseling, was honest to us about their struggles, what it really took to make a marriage work, what things are worth worrying about and what aren’t.
In the end, yea we were young (I guess that’s young. We went to A&M, ring by spring baby so it seemed really normal), but it’d have been more foolish to not get married. Why wait when we knew we wanted to be married? Why wait when it’d have made finding jobs and apartments more difficult? Why wait when we were both committed to each other and desired to live for God together? At some point, you just have to think, it’ll be hard at times no matter what, and no matter your age, you’re either going to rise to the occasion or you aren’t. It has brought maturity in areas I didn’t know I needed maturity. Marriage makes you come to terms with who you really are- a sinner in need or repentance and a heck of a lot of grace.