Life. Death. Maybe a little fear…

It seems about every year since high school, at least one close friend/family friend has died. Every time this happens, I start thinking about death. I’m not really afraid of death. I welcome it. I’m ready to go home. Almost. I still have those things I want to do. I really want to graduate college. I really want to get married. I really want to have a job. I really want to see my best friend find Jesus.

About 2 1/2 months ago my mom’s endocrinologist told her she needed to get part of her thyroid taken out, for a “just in case” cancer thing. So she did a few weeks ago. Everything went great, no cancer, so we thought. A couple weeks later (about 2 weeks ago now) my mom gets a call, she has cancer. My dad told me on the phone. My mom sends an EMAIL. I still can’t figure out her reaction. My dad seemed kind of worried, but I honestly think they seemed more worried when we moved to Texas and my dad didn’t have a job. The end of the e-mail just said, “Will keep you posted, but please pray for discernment, wisdom and the cancer not to be anywhere else.”

Up until the actual cancer part, it sounds exactly like they’re looking at multiple job offers, or we’re thinking about moving again.

So, needless to say, for the first week or whatever, I didn’t think much of it because my mom seemed to not put a lot of thought in it. I did talk to her once on the phone real fast about it, and you could hear a little bit of emotion in her voice, but overall she kept her cool.

I’m in summer school, with way too much time on my hands with only working 9 hours a week. So I’ve sat and looked up stuff on it and gone over times when those other people have died, be it by cancer, car wrecks, drug overdoses, whatever. I started freaking out and I actually cried. And then God did what He’s so good at. He comforted me. My boyfriend was at a youth camp as a counselor last week and they were going over Psalm 145:4. Well, I went and read all of Psalm 145… here’s where that amazing comfort came in.

17 Everything God does is right—
the trademark on all his works is love.

18 God’s there, listening for all who pray,
for all who pray and mean it.

19 He does what’s best for those who fear him—
hears them call out, and saves them.

20 God sticks by all who love him,
but it’s all over for those who don’t.

He’s listening to our prayers! He’s got our backs. He takes care of those who love Him.

What. A. Sweet. Sweet. Reminder.


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